#momlife

So here's the deal. I've written and re-written this post one too many times. I haven't blogged in six months and it's because I haven't been able to put my words together. Too many times did I sit down to type my thoughts and the enemy whispered to me, "Who really cares what you have to say?" Well, the fact of the matter is, I don't really care. During Mason's pregnancy and first year of life, I blogged at least once a month to document it all. I only blogged ONCE during Reese's entire pregnancy. And that's just unfortunate. But I will not dwell in the past. I will carry on and keep on typing. For me. And for the sake of documenting all of the things I'm sure I'll forget one day.

Both pics taken on the day of birth!

My childREN. Two of them. What?

So, I'm now a mom of TWO! Holy. Crap. Since I had a c-section with Mason, I had a repeat section with Reese. [Pretty sure the Lord did not intend for me to push a baby out anyway. Shout out to the mamas who have. Remind me to hug you next time I see you!] Yes, c-sections suck, too. But I will say the recovery this go round has been MUCH better than the last! I'll spare you the details. One major thing that's been different is my hormone levels. After I had Mason, I was an emotional wreck. Granted, the whole breastfeeding thing pushed me over the edge a little. But even after I switched Mason to formula, my levels were just all over the place. I was happy, sad, angry, pissed, hangry, sad. I would just cry and cry and cry my eyes out. This time, I'm happy. Blessed. I'm ENERGIZED?! [Yes, I just said that.] Even with the lack of sleep, I feel like getting outside or playing on the floor with Mason. I've been cleaning the house more. And I'm pretty sure it has everything to do with my time I spent in prayer the day Reese was born. I had so many worries that I would go through what I went through with Mason. The internal complications. The hormones. The sadness. So, I decided to defeat my enemy with the power of prayer. I prayed and prayed and prayed that day. On the way to the hospital. While I was getting my spinal. Even during the surgery. I prayed for peace that passed all understanding. I prayed for the Lord's presence to be with me every step of the way. And I felt it. I felt Him. From the day we brought Reese home, I have felt different. I feel like I have an even better grip on life than I did before I even got pregnant with Mason. And I'm so so grateful for that. [p.s. there's really not much to comment on my pregnancy -- it wasn't too different from Mason's!]

I did NOT want to take any pictures in the hospital...but I'm so glad my sis-in-law, Mandi, made me take this pic ;) I will forever cherish it. No matter how much of a hot mess I look!

My little pretty bow-head!

Those cheeks yall!

I'm not sure if yall know this...but I have a BEAUTIFUL baby girl! And the sweetest. She's such a good baby. She's a great eater and a great sleeper. I mean...she's only two weeks old. So she sleeps. A lot. But she's great at it ;) I still can't believe I have a daughter!

Mason's first time to "hold" Reese!

Mason's version of giving sister sugars...him leaning over [not touching her whatsoever] saying "awwwww"

I mean, there's really no reason for a caption here.

So back to that whole mom of two thing... if you couldn't tell, Mason's still not too sure about Reese. Obviously, he will come around one day and love her to pieces. But for now, he's just not interested. When she cries, he looks at me like he's saying "FIX HER, MOM!" He does like to "help" me in other ways though. If I ask him to pick up her paci or grab her a diaper, [most of the time] he does it. And then expects 10 minutes of praise for it. But hey, it could totally be worse. Yesterday was the first day for me to have both of them at home with me all day long. It wasn't that bad. Then again, Reese sleeps. A lot. So get back to me in a few months when she's older and needier ;)

I'm excited to get back into the world of blogging! Hopefully, I'll get back into blogging about things outside of #momlife. Maybe back to my "All Things Girl" days.

I'll leave you with a few hilarious pics of Mason. Because, why not?

"Little sister? What little sister? I'm just over here playin with this curtain."

"Can't touch this!"

Someone needed some attention...

Until next time...

Lately...

Wow! It's been a while. Lots of life change in between my last post and this one! But I am excited to see what the Lord has ahead! I guess I'll just jump right into this...

Soooo in case you haven't heard, I'm pregnant. Yay! Tomorrow, I'll be 14 weeks. Helloooo second trimester! Praise God! I've been [impatiently] waiting for you. That first trimester was a doozie. Second pregnancy has been harder on me than the first, only because I have a one-year-old to chase around all day! And that's hard work, yall. I can't just take a nap when I want. #firstworldprobs But Brandon and I are definitely nervous excited about Baby #2. Our next ultrasound is scheduled for Sept 1st. We will find out the gender that day, as long as the baby cooperates. Can't wait to find out if it's a boy or a girl! I keep trying to teach Mason to point to my belly and say "baby" but I think he's still in a little denial that he won't be the baby anymore ;)

This was the best pic I could get. He was too busy watching Mickey!

Mason started MDO (Mother's Day Out) last week. For now, he's going one day a week and is on the waiting list for an additional day. His first day was pretty rough. He did not enjoy it. I know he will eventually grow to like it, but this transition is going to be a hard one. Separation anxiety is a real thing. I've never experienced a death grip like I did when I was dropping him off. It kills me to know he is sad/upset all day, but I know that this is what is best for him right now and as hard as it is to experience it, I have to let it happen. I also need to finally give it up to the Lord. On his first day, I wondered about him all day. I wondered if he ever quit crying. If he was sad or happy. If he was napping or playing. And when I would start to worry, I was reminded that God is in control. But it was easy for me to hear that reminder, not knowing how his first day would go. I thought there was a possibility he would calm down and actually have a good day. Tomorrow, I'll drop him off for his second week and I will struggle with worrying about him all day. I need to give God complete control of this situation. I'm currently praying through this. Pray with me, if you would!

For several months now, I'd been feeling very convicted of my social media usage. How much I was on it. How much time I WASTED on it. How I was starting to let it get to me. I knew I needed a break from it, but I kept ignoring the conviction. But if you've ever ignored God trying to speak to you, you know how I was feeling. Finally, one night I was giving Mason a bath and it just hit me. I just started weeping. The conviction was bearing down so heavy on me, I couldn't handle it anymore. I knew God was telling me to take Facebook, Twitter & Instagram off my phone. To completely disconnect myself from it for a little while. I needed to get out of the habit of constantly checking feeds filled with non-sense that in the long run doesn't really matter. Don't get me wrong - I think social media can be a great thing when being used with good intent. But if the whole point of posting pictures, scripture, quotes, etc is to see how many likes you can get...that's not good intent. I've decided to keep social media off my phone, but to allow myself to enjoy it in my spare time. When I've done what I needed to do. After I've had my quiet time with the Lord. When Mason is taking a nap, or when I just have a moment to myself. I refuse to allow it to rule over my life again.

Welp, like I said before, I'm excited to see what the Lord has in store for my little family's future! My prayer is that I am consistently seeking His guidance in everything that I do. I pray that God works miracles with sweet Mason and that he keeps him and Baby #2 healthy and thriving. I pray I give over complete control to Him over every area of my life.

Until next time...

Mason Turns ONE!

You read that right. My baby is ONE! I can't believe it myself. I'm actually struggling to even find the words to write in this post. But I will try my best! 

Mason Richard Burnside

Age: ONE YEAR OLD
Weight: 23 lbs

Height: Not sure? I need to measure.

Mason is one happy little fella, as long as he isn't sick. [Just like his momma, he doesn't handle sickness well.] He loves to play in the living room with all of his toys, crawl around the entire apartment and get into everything he shouldn't, and watch Mickey Mouse. [Duh] He loves reading books, opening and closing doors, and throwing the ball. He also loves being outside, playing with his cousins, and singing songs with momma, specifically Itsy Bitsy Spider, ABCs, Jesus Loves Me, and Old MacDonald. 

Mason is crawling around [very fast, I might add] all over the place. He has taken a few steps, assisted with toys. But he doesn't have much interest in walking right now! I try and take his hands and walk him around the living room, but he'll take a few steps and decide he can get places faster if he crawls. He can say "mama", "dada", and "dog". He can wave, clap, dance, and pull up. And he has 7 teeth!

Some of Mason's favorite foods are chicken, eggs, sausage, mac-n-cheese, noodles, grits, mashed potatoes and ice cream sandwiches. He also likes the squeezable pouches of the pureed fruits and veggies. He also loves drinking water! He's a good eater! He'll eat pretty much anything Brandon and I eat. 

This last year has been one of the best years of my life! I feel like it was just yesterday that I was headed to the hospital not knowing what was about to hit me! Becoming a momma has been one of the biggest blessings I've ever experienced. And seeing Brandon jump into his rockstar dad role has made me fall in love with him all over again. We are both so blessed to be this little boy's parents! I couldn't imagine my life without him. He makes me smile and laugh daily. I love seeing his little personality shine through. I pray he keeps his sweet spirit. I pray he grows to know the Lord. 

I know I have so much more I could write, but I'm not sure I can take this emotional torture anymore. [I realize how dramatic that sounds. Judge me.] I am so grateful for my sweet Mase Mase! Excited to see what this next year brings!